Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Let's get "HEALTHY"

Maybe you already read about it, or maybe I haven't posted it yet, but I completed my fifth marathon on Sunday - YAY!!! 5 BEFORE 25!!! It was on Jeju Island (or Cheju-do, depending on the day: spelling changes between the J and Ch). We took a plane there, and before I boarded I grabbed a complimentary Korea Herald. Browsing through the pages I found this hilarious gem and thought it fit to share with you:

Health tips for soccer fans reads the headline, by Lee Ji-yoon:

"With Korea's first World Cup match due on Saturday, the government has released health guidelines for enthusiastic soccer fans.
The 'HEALTHY' guidelines stands for Heart protection, Exercise, Aqua, Low-calorie diet, using public Transportation, Happy mind and stop Yelling, according to the Ministry of Health and Welfare.
Health officials said that feeling extreme excitement or tension affects the bloodstream and raises blood pressure. And the symptoms could be lead to cardiac infarction.
Proper rest, relaxing the body posture and taking slow, deep breaths during the game and at halftime can help in relieving such symptoms, they advised.
When people yell loudly, a cyst can occur in the vocal cords. Alcohol and smoking also cause dehydration. Health officials say that drinking water can be helpful to balance the humidity.
They advised not to shout for more than 30 minutes and to avoid noise and dust.
Because most of the matches will be broadcasted in the evening, soccer fans are recommended to eat more fruits and vegetables like bananas and peanuts, rather than chicken and carbonated drinks, while watching the matches.
A high-calorie diet at night can put pressure on the digestive organs.
In cooperation with the Ministry of Culture, Sports and Tourism, the Ministry of Health and Welfare plans to promote the health tips through the Internet and large screens that will be installed in cities nationwide."

You've been yelling 29 minutes already? You better take a rest. Go eat some vegetable peanuts.

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Sinking Fast

I enrolled in a Korean for Beginners class at  경희대학교 (or "Kyung Hee Dae Hag Gyo"). Yeah, leave it up to me to start taking my studying seriously with three months left. Excellent! Anyway, I was really excited because I can finally read (though I'm guessing at a kindergarten level, though realistically below as I usually have no idea what I'm reading/saying) and I was really looking forward to being able to say more than your average greetings, ordering at restaurants/bars and asking price/directions. Yes - notice how I'm writing in the past tense. Uh oh! 


My co-worker/friend Kat and I left for campus straight after our school bell rang, we signed in at the front desk and were directed to the classroom. Since class didn't start for 15 minutes, we decided to wait outside so as not to seem too eager. As we sat we joked about the last time we were in a classroom, almost three years for me and only one for her; we hoped our professor to be a female or an unattractive/non-distracting male; most of all we couldn't wait to learn.

Our watches ticked nearer to 7:30 and we picked up our purses and headed inside. Much to our dismay, this dude who asked where the Conversational Korean class was was in the new classroom we were told to go into. Uh oh! Not looking so great. His name is Steven, he shows us his book and it's full of questions and answers - dialogue practice. Panic sets in slightly, but Kat and I reassure each other that it's Steven who is in the wrong classroom. A few more minutes and two Chinese girls come in the class. Then one more. Then the teacher...

From the moment the she walked in the classroom she's speaking Korean, and it's fast. Reeeeeeally fast, and seemingly advanced. I look at Kat with pure panic in my eyes. From her gestures we gather she wants us to open a book - a book which neither of us have. Steven offers to share. Kat is directed by the teacher (unbeknownst to me; I thought she was abandoning ship) to share with one of the Chinese girls. The teacher wants us to change things into the future tense, words/verbs that I do not know. I sink lower in my chair. So this is what it feels like to drown. I mutter to myself. I actually muttered it, and had Kat been sitting next to me I'm sure she would have said, "I know! Right?" but Steven was busy translating and my humorous despair was shared with no one.

Calculus wasn't as hard as this class was, and I couldn't even blend in behind a sea of heads as there were only six of us in the class. Anyway, so we're conjugating verbs for about a half an hour when the teacher asks us how long we've been studying and what we've studied. She tells me "Fighting!" when I reveal that I've only just learned the alphabet, and then there's 30 more minutes of her telling me "괜찮아요" ("kwen chan i o"/"It's okay.") then she finally leaves the classroom and brings back the Korean 1 book which is what I'm talking about!! Basic vocabulary and building on that. She took down our information and said she would try to move her schedule around to accommodate teaching Kat and I after our work (if not, I better get my money back as it was false advertising that led me to there in the first place, "All you need to know is how to read?"). Class ended, and I crawled onto shore sputtering saltwater and pulling seaweed from my hair; I didn't die. Let's hope it's more understandable second time around. I'll let you know.

Thursday, June 3, 2010

Awesome!

Two of these things are really awesome and one is in the sarcastic sense:

A1. Allie brought in a bazillion toys for Show and Tell last week, two "hand-uh pones" (green and orange) being among them. Top was playing with the orange one and offered Aden the green one, but Aden wanted the orange one and threw a hissy fit. Top wouldn't share and I didn't make him; I should've just taken both phones away, but I figure they'd work it out. Aden wasn't happy and started sucking his face in like an old man (he does it when he's angry or getting scolded; I'll have to take some pictures of this as it's probably the most hilarious thing, ever), but then he asked for a sheet of paper and I'm thinking, Alright, he's over this phone business. But, no:
Anger management issues much? Awesome.

B2. I bit into the granola bar I bought yesterday and I thought, Hmm... this tastes fishy - that's weird. I looked down, and what do I see? Little sardine-ish fishies syruped into the nuts and grains. Not tasty. Last time I checked fish were not a granola-friendly ingredient, at least not in my book. I'm scarred. Awesome.

C3. Last week in the playroom, Willie runs up to me all excited like he's ready to tell me the most amazing thing, ever, and he sputters out something about Danny and Roy. He's smiling, so he's not tattling on them. I'm confused. I ask him to repeat and he says, "Danny or Roy is breaking the wind!" Then he starts to run away, and I say, "Wait - Willie. Like pthbth [fart noise]?" And he laughs hysterically and says, "Yes!" Who says "breaking wind" these days? Awesome.

Addition to the awesome-ness: Aden is always in a good mood at the beginning of the week and he'll come up and squeeze my face and put his face real close to mine and then blink his long eyelashes on my nose or cheeks. It's the weirdest and cutest thing, ever, and it gives me the giggles.

Things aren't so good at work right now - I won't go into details - and I'm actually quite stressed about the politics of the place. For a brief moment in time I really wanted to quit, but then my kids ran up to me this morning and attacked my legs/jumped up to pull down my arms for hugs or whatever, shouting "Kate Teacher! Kate Teacher!" [per usual]  and I couldn't bear the thought of leaving them before my time was through. I only have three months left, and I don't quit things. This too shall pass, and if it doesn't, I always have the kids. They're pretty awesome.

Monday, May 10, 2010

Holly, Jolly Christmas

Alright, so I know I'm about 5 months late with this post (what?! Five months!! Holy cow!), but a little bit about the Christmas celebration at school just for you.
First let it be said that it was shenanigans. The Santa costume the directors bought was supremely awesome, but also blond; Santa's from Sweden, you know. Also, I know the shades make me look either a1) really ridiculously hip, or b2) slightly Unibomber-esque, but because I'm more of a Mrs. Claus by nature, and one of the few teachers at the school, sunglasses were needed to disguise my lady eyes. Stuffing for my belly full o' jelly was not provided, so I brought a pillow - brilliant, but at the same time I definitely should'a turned it horizontal as my Santa was more along the lines of Dolly Parton at a Christmas extravaganza.
The days events began with a song and dance from each class, you'll remember my children's performance (at the end of this post)? They were a little shy this time around so I had to get up there and perform with them which was all well and good, but then I had to slip out to change oh-so quickly into the magical man. 

I waited on the stairs for the singing and dancing to finish and started sweating quite a bit, believe it or not - beards are hot! Then the occasional child or two would have to use the bathroom and be ushered into the elevator, only to wiggle around wondering why they weren't being allowed to look in the other direction. SANTA!
As it goes with most things at my school, I didn't really know what was going to go on until I sat in Santa's chair, and those naughty and nice charts we wrote for each student that morning, I read them off for each student... all 48 - 65ish of them. It's actually quite difficult speaking in a deep baritone even as an alto, and to make it loud enough for all to hear? Mi-oh-my! Not to mention the beard fibers kept getting in my mouth, my glasses were sweating off, the children were trying to look close to figure out if it was really me, and I was handling pages in loose-fitting felt gloves. I'm honestly not complaining about any of this by any means, it was so much fun and more often than not I had to stifle my laughter as I bellowed, "Now David, can you promise Santa that you're going to do your best not to eat your pencils and erasers in Kathleen Teacher's class any more?" and the doe-eyed child would look up at me and nod earnestly, hands out, waiting for his present. Picking boogers, fighting, not doing homework, running in the classroom and eating paper were all on the naughty list. I said two-to-three nice things and one naughty (let's work on it) thing for each kid. 
Needless to say, the assembly lasted quite a while. There were a few minutes - I can't remember why - that us English teachers had to stall (maybe the tape ran out?) and we let the kids ask me questions. It was fun to work on some improv. Mrs. Claus was busy baking the elves cookies while they cleaned up the workshop and got ready for next year. I planned on hitting up Antarctica after my sleigh ride, with the missus, for a change of pace and to visit my penguin friends. The reindeer were on the roof, and oh - could I name them... well, why don't I see if the children could instead. Then there was my most favorite of all, I was wearing sunglasses because I just had lasik surgery. Hey, I thought it was clever.
It was a sweaty and snowless Christmas Eve day, but it was magical and fun all the same. I'm really happy that I got to do it, and even though most kids knew it was me, I tried to convince them that I had food poisoning instead and I was so sad that I didn't get to meet Santa before he sprang to his sleigh, but I said I thought I heard him call out "Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night!"

Sunday, May 9, 2010

The Little Things

It's always the little things that make up the big picture, like this. I've completed eight months and I have four to go. Recently, I've been thinking a lot about what it's going to be like back home; things I'm looking forward to, things I'll miss. The things I'm looking forward to are mostly people and the ease of living and convenience of getting the things I need, but the missing area has been a big thought, too. I'm going to miss cooking delicious, tasty galbi, and getting "service-uh" when I buy many things at stores. I'm going to miss the cheapness of things and not having to tip. I'm going to miss being able to talk on my cellphone when I'm stories underground or behind a building, and having lightning fast internet. It's going to seem weird when people back home try to be discreet about checking themselves out in a mirror or a passing reflective surface, and then get embarrassed because you caught them. It might take me some time to figure out if a couple walking together is in a relationship because a1.) he won't be carrying his girlfriend's purse and b2.) they won't be wearing matching shoes/sweatshirts/complete outfits. I might think Americans are the sloppiest dressers I've ever seen and wonder why women aren't doing everything in heels. I'll wonder why no one is staring at me like I'm going to do something amazing/crazy at any moment, and think it's so bizarre when people get offended because I'm staring at them (though I learned today that the turn around and stare is something only done to Westerners and that older Koreans wouldn't stare at the younger generation - racial prejudice? genuine interest? old age? I'm not sure which one). People might think I'm strange when I bow in entering and leaving a place. I wonder how many times I'm going to slip up and run/walk on the left side of the sidewalk and say "Shilyehamnida" ("Excuse me"), or answer "nae" in agreement or "anio" in disagreement. I'm going to miss all the hand holding and the affection towards same-sex friends in public. KIMCHI!! WHAT WILL I DO WITHOUT KIMCHI (and bibimbab and chamchi kimbab)!?! I always thought it was crazy how people said they were going to miss kimchi so much when they went home, but man! I'm going to miss it oh-so much; it's oh-so tasty! And my little babies, my heart hurts already thinking about saying good-bye to their sweet faces. I'm going to miss all these things and so much more, I'm sure I'll continue to add to the list, in fact I know I will.

The reason I've been thinking about this more is that my good friend, Andrea, has less than two months left, and another friend, Sophie, just left. There's so much I still need to get in while I'm here, and I am so looking forward to the month or more of travel (dependent on job things back home - I really want this one position, but if I don't get it then I can have longer to travel, so either way I think I'll be able to make due in the happiness department), and while there are so many things I'm going to miss and things that I know will seem strange to me like, "What?! Why is this uncooked grocery store meat refrigerated and not being scooped into bags?" and "What do you mean I have to leave the bar at 2am?" I'm going to miss those rowdy-staggering through the streets drunk on soju businessmen Monday through Friday. There are also a lot of things I look forward to: thick yogurt, seedless grapes, a variety of APPLES!!!, peanut butter cups and gum that isn't flower flavored/doesn't dissolve in your mouth, riding my bike without worrying that I might be hit (even on the sidewalk), breathing fresh air, and being able to read and understand signs that tell me how to get from here to there.

All in all, I'm excited to see what the next four months will bring, and I'll do my best to continue to share the stories with you. -- The weather was perfect for our picnic the other week, and I still haven't shown you photos of when I was Santa Claus for my kids, so there's at least two things to write about. I went to a ballet in Seoul last weekend, and this weekend I wore the penguin at a World DJ Fest, so two more. In the words of Mrs. C I'll "just try" for you. (Here's hoping these aren't just words and that they'll turn into words... for you to read.)

Hope this finds you happy and healthy!

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

all you have to do is ask.

It's so true, isn't it? Sure, sometimes the answer will be no, but more often than not I find the answer to be yes. You just have to ask.

Case in point: during our last staff meeting (end-ish March), after discussing the ways to excite the elementary students into staying (kids are dropping like flies; the curriculum is so boring even us teachers aren't fans of it, but we have to feign interest as the children whine, "Please! No more I Can Write! I don't like!" neither do I, kid, neither do I; don't even get me started on the text book stories that read about Benjamin Franklin and the diversity of America - really!? Really!? Let's please have something relating to Asian culture) by including more games and hands-on activities during class, I started getting stir crazy sitting in the conference room. "Mr. C!" I groaned. "You gotta let these kids out of the school every once in a while! They're wild as it is, but when the weather starts getting nicer, they're going to get even crazier; it's called Spring Fever and it happens even at a young age. Please! Let these children play! They have to play outside! We don't even have a playground. They need the sunshine! They need to bloom like flowers in the sun!" By this point I'm pretty certain I was gripping the edges of the table, "If you don't let the children outside then I'm going to go crazy! I'll go so crazy I'll throw this table through the window - okay, I joke, I joke. But seriously, Mr. C, let these children play in the park. Something!" He stared at me quietly for a moment then smiled and said, "Okay. I will think about it." I sat back relaxed and said, "I was just joking about the table; didn't mean to get so worked up."

Later that afternoon, Mrs. C came up to me, "Kate-e Teacher." I turned, she smiled. "Ok. Children go outside. Two times. How about?" I looked to a co-teacher for translation; two times per month, during gym class we can take our kids outside to the park up and across the street, as long as the weather is nice and we have a Korean co-teacher with us to help keep an eye. I was so elated I grabbed Mrs. C into a bear hug, "Thank you! Thank you!" then she grilled me on my best and worst students (happens about every week).

Here are a few photos from our first outdoor adventure:

 (Aden was iffy on the jump, but he went for it - success!)
 (How could you deny this happiness?)
 (Through the slurred mumbles I caught that Ashley wanted her photo taken... I think.)
(Danny is always adorable, even when he doesn't listen; down the slide, Danny.)
 (Danny's also in love with Stella, brought her a ring to school!)
 (Roooooy! m'boy.)
 (Allie and Willie - check out that perm!)
(Children fascinated by worms. On closer inspection, sticks.)

We're supposed to go to some park (driving distance) tomorrow, but it's been raining all week and supposed to continue tomorrow... I was really looking forward to a field trip outside the dentist's office (once a semester... twice for me so far = boooooooooooring).

In other news. Now I'm not complaining, I'm simply stating, y'know. Just so y'know. Y'know? Our directors recently took out the water (hot/cold; purified) machine in the lobby which runs about $40/month and kept the "coffee" (sweet, disgusting; made from a mix) machine which runs about $50/month because Mr. C drinks the coffee (and apparently doesn't want to take the time to mix the mix with hot water himself...) and they can't afford to keep both when they've just installed a $5,000 seawater fish tank... that happened today, the fish tank; the water machine was removed the other week. The coffee machine was gone by midday today. The fish will be put in in three weeks after the water has time to purify... so I was told. Sometimes it seems it's all about looks over logic... I don't understand, but I'm not the only one as I see the Korean staff shaking their heads as well. Just some news.

Oh! And we get a new teacher on Saturday! I'm excited. Our last teacher didn't work out so well and she was fired after a month and a half for things she did and didn't do in the second week. Our directors aren't big on confrontation either... just saying. But, things are good with the kids, amazing in fact; they make me so happy. I've almost completed eight months with four to go!!

Good days; sunshine ahead.

Monday, April 5, 2010

What a FIND!!!

On my way home from school tonight, Kat and I stumbled upon a pile of someone's unwanted goods. JACKPOT!! She walked with a small set of drawers and I got a small shelving unit - I've been wanting some shelves to alleviate the stacks and stacks of papers, books, other things stackable around my apartment. Huzzah!

Then, I was able to sweet talk Andrea, Jennie, Kat and Annie into helping me move a couch from Sara's apartment to my place. When we got to Sara's she had a new couch, and it was a couch she found in the park, and it was a nice couch. The new couch I have is orange with silver-gold swirls and I'm very excited to have another sitting surface. There kind of isn't any room for it and it's currently blocking the entrance to my "laundry closet" but that's okay, climbing is fun. I HAVE A COUCH!! Maybe I could pivot it and use it as a partition between kitchen and living space... but let's not get ahead of ourselves.

All of these good finds tonight made me so grateful, a1.) for sweet street finds: "new" shelving unit, desk/table my laptop and other paper piles reside on, and b2.) friends sharing their finds when they move or get tired of them: nightstand, trashcan, lamp(!), and "new" couch. When I stop on the street to inspect the goods left behind ("This table/chair/what-have-you is in great condition! Why would anyone throw it away?" Do a wobble test: "Durable, too!"), I laugh and think of immigrants back home who get their trucks out and slowly scour through the alleys and sidewalks of Chi City looking for sweet finds. Well, the only thing that separates them from us - they have trucks, those lucky ducks! Yes indeed. Sweet finds. They excite us, and for good reason: they're in good shape, and most importantly, they are free.
Korea, you continue to make me smile. The well of stories you provide me with gets deeper on the daily. I (make a heart with my hands) you. ^^

I took Andrea and Kat out for twist ice cream after the heavy lifting and pivoting, and it was taaaaaaasty!